Some stories come along that prompt a curious tilt of the head—a sort of mental double-take—before the facts register. The tale of an allegedly stolen RV, a naked couple, and what might be charitably described as “creative motoring,” easily lands in that category.
According to a report from The Smoking Gun, a West Virginia patrol officer had one of those days when reality seemed to blur into an unusual twist of Mad Libs and small-town infamy. The scene: an RV rolling through Bluefield, driver visibly straddled by an unclothed and reportedly quite intoxicated passenger. The outlet describes how Officer R.L. Hamm pulled the vehicle over, only to be told by a passerby that the RV’s occupants had managed a seat switch before the officer reached them. When Hamm approached, Shannon Bryant had taken the wheel, while Matthew McDonnell had shifted to the passenger’s side—a maneuver that, at the very least, demonstrates their ability to multitask under pressure.
“We Were Fucking.” (Their Words, Not Mine.)
Upon questioning by Officer Hamm about their actions while the RV was in motion, Bryant reportedly responded with blunt honesty: “We were fucking.” The Smoking Gun details this candid admission in the criminal complaint, adding that both individuals were naked at the time. Not exactly a textbook lesson in subtlety or situational awareness, but undeniably straightforward. McDonnell later confirmed to officers that they “were naked and attempting to engage in sexual activity while driving,” and had only switched seats after seeing the patrol car.
The Inventory: Not Just in It for the Thrill
After the couple exited the RV, a search revealed further complications. The Smoking Gun notes police found drug paraphernalia, a bag containing a white powdery substance, painkillers, and a broken glass pipe. Bryant claimed McDonnell threw drugs out of the vehicle during the stop—an allegation supported by officers who recovered those items in the area she indicated. A check of the vehicle identification number led to yet another revelation: the RV had been reported stolen from Princeton, a nearby city.
The outlet also reports that both Bryant and McDonnell have extensive criminal records and were unable to post bond after their arrest.
Charges, Criminal Records, and the High Cost of Spontaneity
Bryant and McDonnell were arrested on charges including indecent exposure, drug possession, DUI, and possession of a stolen vehicle, according to The Smoking Gun. Both have pleaded not guilty.
The collective absurdity here—caught naked, driving a stolen motorhome, allegedly intoxicated, attempting a romantic interlude while barreling down the road—raises the question of whether this was a product of daring spontaneity or simply a chain reaction of poor decisions. The specifics, at least, were all laid bare in the police documents.
Reflections on Roadside Romance
Stepping back, the story has a sort of offbeat inevitability—one of those moments where fate and folly seem to keep escalating, until a patrol car brings everything, quite literally, to a halt. From an archivist’s perspective, it’s both a reminder of how far some will go in pursuit of adventure (or distraction) and just how creative human misadventure can become.
Does “memorable” count for anything in these situations? Is this just another footnote in the ever-expanding volumes of American roadside folklore? Whatever the answer, the open roads through Bluefield have a story that, for once, might never be matched—pants or no pants.
